One might think that I may be a loud, outspoken type of personality. You would be wrong. I am extremely quiet, especially in larger groups.
Even though I write a ton all over the web, when it comes to talking - I don't do much of it. Yes, I do speak at conferences and seminars. But when it comes to group conversations, I normally take the back seat. I often enjoy listening, and then speaking when I have something good to say.
I used to love listening to speakers who would say so much in just a single line. You know the type. There are those that will repeat the same message over and over again in a 30 minute speech. And there are those that will say 30 messages in a single speech. I much prefer listening to the speaker who says 30 messages in a single speech then listening to a speaker who gives one message in a single speech.
There was one speaker I remember specifically. Every single line was a message in itself. He said a line, and that alone could have been a 30 minute discussion. But he stopped there and then moved on to his next line. Yes, the next line could have been a 30 minute discussion.
Back to being quiet. There is this concept in Judaism (I can be wrong, if so, Israel Brother, please comment).... I think it goes... We are only given so many words in our life time. The more you talk, the less time you got. I don't think it is literal. But there is 100% value in that statement. I think it has to do with the value of listening what others are saying and then only speaking afterwards.
I am being distracted left and right from this post, so I am cutting it short. Which is kinda fitting, i.e. less words. ;-)
Update: I should clarify. I have nothing against loud people, I am just explaining that I am not loud. That is just not my personality. Nothing is wrong with loud people.


Comments
Great post - I think the concept of listening and learning rather than making your voice the loudest one out there can sometimes be lost on people (especially in this industry!).
Re the line about having a finite number of words - I had heard somewhere that it had something to do with the Birkat Kohanim; the blessing for material wealth is only three words, spiritual enlightenment five and peace is seven (i.e. we should be using our words/energy for peace and spiritual enlightenment rather than material success). I don't know if that helps :)
Now for some quiet time...
Posted by: Kerstin Baker-Ash | May 6, 2008 11:49 AM
I was reading this post and just wondering what made you write this
what made u think of this
has someone said somehting to you or not
let me know
Posted by: listener | May 6, 2008 11:56 AM
You learn a lot more from listening than talking...a philosophy I certainly follow.
Posted by: Todd Mintz | May 6, 2008 12:00 PM
listener, honestly, it was just a topic on my list of things to write on a slow day. Today, is fairly slow...
Posted by: Barry Schwartz | May 6, 2008 12:13 PM
Barry,
As you probably know, our sages ascribe a tremendous level of wisdom to the man/woman who knows how to keep quit.
Talking allot doesn't require too much forethought and is in many instances indicative of the exact opposite ("empty cans rattle").
A person who knows when to keep quiet, is a person in full control.
You're a good guy.
Regards,
Posted by: Judah | May 6, 2008 12:35 PM
My personal motto is: “Speak softly but wear a LOUD shirt”
Posted by: Hawaii SEO | May 7, 2008 3:37 PM
well said !
Posted by: Ron | May 7, 2008 4:41 PM
That's true. I'm more of a listener rather than a speaker myself; as a matter of fact: I'm hardly ever the speaker. I'm sure that some people think it's rude to keep quiet, but that's who I am, and I can't change. So if they think I'm a douchebag or think I suck then tuff luck. We all talk because we want to be heard anyway, so I actually don't mind listening to people; even if it is a bunch of rubbish. I think most people pretty much know when to put a sock in it without us telling them to; unless they're deliberately trying to annoy us! lol:) But that's cool with me. Being loud and being talkative are two entirely different things I think... Okay. I'm shutting up!:)
Posted by: Cliff | June 4, 2008 10:04 PM